The Book of Joshua P!!

I guess I am looking at this blog as a place to filter out all the crap that’s in my head…. no one reads these things anyway, right?

It feels almost appropriate that I’d turn to an inanimate place to dump on, I have friends, but none I feel all that close with, and Molly doesn’t deserve the brunt of my retardedness. I’ve got Otis, and there’s history there, and the true freedom that comes from being able to not give a shit about being politically incorrect, but, in reality, I’ve only known him a short while, punctuated by a long absence in the middle. In addition to that, his main concern should be getting funding for his fucking film, not whether or not his star is a basket case.

I guess I’m fortunate. I grew up in a family that said stuff like "I love you" and "Fuck off" directly to each other’s faces, and we always hugged and threw stuff at each other. Emotionally, I like to think we’re very close; I wish Sam, my brother, was more willing to spend time with me, but he’s got so much going on with Imperative Reaction, work, and just generally being a 27 year old guy with some freedom and a little cash. It’d be nice if my folks were only a drive away, like when they were in Sacramento, but I guess them moving to Seattle from as far out as Nashville could be viewed as them meeting me halfway. At least it won’t be so hard to get everyone together for when Molly and I get married (yes, Sam, you WILL be the best man. )

Yeah, I said the "M-word". It’s bound to happen someday, and she seems to like me most of the time. The only compromises I have to put up with in the relationship are that she doesn’t want kids and she’s too cautious with life in general - neither of those do I have a leg to stand on should I wish to challenge her, since I can’t promise our kids wouldn’t get my Marfan Syndrome, and her caution allows me to keep expanding my savings account, get Laser Vision Correction, custom rims for my car, and even G4 iBook without necessarily having a job! I’m even putting together a frickin movie!

God, I’ve got so much more to write about… my (unnerving to some) "chitty chitty bang bang hyper-good luck lifestyle", Saki Munro, the "last honest person I knew" took his final sail down the commode, "what the hell am I gonna change my horrendous last name name to?", the "Dark world of Mac upgrades", "SGI Buddhism ~ am I crazy or is life really this easy?", future projects other than my movie, incorporating myself - "will I be the President of ‘World Domination Enterprises, All Circuits Are Busy Inc. or just simply Joshua Brenner & co.?", "staying out of the cubicle for good = unemployed and happy", "film festival facts and fiction", am I "the crazy guy at the gym"?, "why I don’t care about clubs anymore (yet i still want to throw one of my own)", my secret love / hate relationship with Dr. Laura, "who do you tell about your secret identity?", "the benefits of never blending in: even among the so called individuals", "funny things to say to people when they can’t hear or can’t touch you", the "secret guide to being a decent person thus gaining a relationship with someone ideal", the "art of sunglasses", "do you poop too much?", "what would Dr. Phil / Oprah do"?, and much, much more.

It’s hot out, and my 1920’s apartment has just so much fucking "charm" from the old world that I can’t get A/C because it’ll blow the fuse. I have to go. When I write I’ll come back and hyperlink to it.

~Joshua P!!

This entry was posted on Saturday, May 14th, 2005 at 3:06 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.