“Our lives are forever changed at the hands of strangers.”
I’m feeling it.
I feel trapped, and I’m going to drive Molly insane. I can’t drive anywhere, I don’t want to freak Molly out and go hop on the subway (I think I could do it, but I’d probably freak out as soon as I got near it, to be honest).
I can’t drive anywhere because my license is in limbo. I don’t have a bike. The bus sucks and takes forever. There’s all these damn things that just keep driving me up the wall, and I just have to suck it up, because I can’t change them. Anyone got a solution for me how to get a valid driver’s license that I can use in Cali.? The DMV here seems to think everyone’s got hundreds of dollars and weeks of time just floating around. I don’t care if I have to go out of state, I want my freedom of travel back, it’s in the constitution.
I got the police incident report in the mail yesterday. Assault with a deadly weapon, Robbery (strongarm), and a freakin KIDNAPPING charge for whoever I can find that did this… that’s a pretty big if, but it’s also a new level of humility to be the victim of such things. You feel so strong, then you look at those words, and it’s hard to look anyone you don’t know in the eye anymore. The world gets to have it’s way with you, just because it can.
I’m kind of angry. I woke up with the term in my head, that I was in the "new minority", the polite white population who couldn’t afford or couldn’t understand the need to forever keep moving further from what they call home. I love Los Angeles; I love Hollywood; I don’t know if I feel safe. I guess it’s a new empathy that arises to have the color of your skin make you a target for violent crimes, and not just harassment… white kids always got picked on in Hawaii, but rarely did anything like this happen.
in the movie Collateral they say that people die on the LA subway and no one notices. I believe it. Someone mopped up a LOT of blood and didn’t bother to tell anyone. MTA didn’t know this happened until Molly called them to file a report. Bastards. Apparently, they hide behind ignorance; the few cameras they do have "in-car" are only closed circuit, viewable by the staff on hand. That translates into, if the driver / staff person saw it happen, they didn’t care enough to help me. I can’t believe civilization has "de-volved" so far.
Then, there are the positives. I have Molly talking to a lawyer who has successfully sued the state, county, and even the United States for similar negligence. The crux of the matter is finding someone else that this has happened to before me, making them of knowledge of the danger and henceforth liable.
We also found a Victims of Crime group, and they have the resources to pay for counseling for us. I don’t know if I can chant my way to ascend out of this pain, and Molly’s gonna take a lot of work just to feel confident in public again. Our lives are forever changed at the hands of strangers.
I went to the liquor store on the corner yesterday, alone. I feel like a 10 year old whose parents are trying to teach him responsibility. Perhaps that’s the moral of this story.
We went to Canter’s last night. That was so awesome, just to be out and doing something normal even if it was only pea soup that I had to water down and drink through a straw, it was a taste of heaven. Rodney on the Roq said Hi to Molly. Yay.
Thank god for coffee.
I’m offering bribes to people that will take me out for errands. I feel guilty, like I’m stealing Molly’s life from her; coffee, gas, whatever is the offer. Just get me the hell out of the house for a bit. A regular ride to and from the gym every other day would be golden; I can’t let this ruin what I had of a life before it.
Well, it’s time to try to fool myself into feeling productive. I hope that, to whoever is reading this, I find you happy, healthy, and well… I’ll plan to catch up to that state in a few weeks.
May 26th, 2005 at 7:45 pm
If you need help, you can call me.
May 27th, 2005 at 7:18 am
Have you thought about bringing this to the attention of the media? Suggest to them there is an underlying problem with Metro, they can do (actually anyone can) an FOIA request for accidents, thefts, robberies, and the like. No time like the present with a new administration coming in — put the pressure on since he’s suppose to be “people” oriented and concerned about the people. Just my two cents. I do wish you a speedy recovery.
May 27th, 2005 at 11:05 am
Hi Joshua - you don’t know me, but I work with your brother at Sideshow Collectibles, so I have been aware of your situation for about a week now. I found your Friendster blog through blogging.la - http://blogging.la (Sean Bonner wrote about it). I saw an excerpt, and I just knew it was you. Just wanted to let you know that you should try getting in touch with Sean Bonner today because he is on the “A list” in the blogging world and can definitely help to get your story out on the internet - and that will maybe get you some more publicity to help in your battle against the MTA and help you to find others who have had the same experience. Good luck - we are ALL thinking of you here at the ’show and sending positive thoughts your way…
May 27th, 2005 at 12:15 pm
Thank you guys so much for your well wishes. If anyone reading this is unable to add me as a friend, due to the FOAF degree of seperation I have, please use my email address to add me:
DJHydrogen(at)Hotmail(dot)com